Saturday I was determined to get outside, I believe the temperature reached 60 degrees! In February! In Pittsburgh! So we hung out in a quaint little town, had nap time, then went back out to the playground. And my heart was happy.
The weather this past weekend fooled me in to thinking it was spring. Come Monday the snow was falling once again. At times it was dreary and overcast but the sun showed itself too.
My struggle with depression was kind of like that. After Maxson was born I had dark and dreary times, spring would peak it's head around the corner and things would start looking sunny. The next morning I would wake and the snow had come to visit again. When I finally felt like Spring would never completely return, I didn't give up! I pressed into God and sought out some help.
For years I always struggled most in the winter. The apathy would set in and I would tread water just trying to survive until Spring or Summer. After a bit of counseling I was set, on my way to healing and despite my father's passing, last Spring was hopeful for me.
This winter has been better than winter's past. I have tried to learn how to thrive through it, instead of just survive. There were moments of thriving, and other moments of surviving. "Will the bitter cold ever end???" But over all, I have been more stable, sound and engaged in life than any other winter before.
I see the hope that is Spring! She 's peeked her darling little head around the corner. She is anxious to show up. And the winter that has settled in my bones, it's slowly shuffling its way out. Each ray of sun on my face, each note from the birds outside my window and each ounce of light that strays later and later into the evening, pushes that darn cold wintery blue right out of my soul.
Hope springs up! And I am glad for the process.
Blessings to you!
~Spring is right around the corner, I am hopeful!~
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