Launch~ The Obligatory Post

Confessions of 2013

As we embark on a new year, it is customary to reflect on the past and look forward to the future, to set goals and resolutions. For myself, 2013 brought pain and healing, deep sorrow and joy, growth and even some happiness. I experienced an unexpected and deep loss this year. 

2013 brought several changes. 

In February we transitioned to a new church. And we are settling in nicely. I am learning that most sustainable relationships happen over time, I like to use the word organic. You can't force anything to happen too soon, just enjoy the journey. We also found out that my dad had cancer, he had to have surgery. They removed everything, but he chose to still do Chemotherapy. Everything seemed fine.

My youngest baby, Maxson turned 2 this year! We had a small celebration at home with the family. I have been feeling a pull more and more, to do simple, scale back. And it was glorious! Less fuss, less stress. 

The month of May brought a huge hole of grief and sorrow when we had to unexpectedly and resistantly say good bye to my dad. The chemo was too strong, his heart was too weak. I used to think you died when it was your time... it wasn't his time. And this is when I was reminded of God's unfathomable grace. The grief was much but so was the grace. 

The summer was strange. Tides were turning within me. A complete healing was rising up and conquering my 2+ year battle with mild depression. That word brings great stigma with it. But the truth is, it is real and it needs to be spoken about. My heart decided that I couldn't let it rule me any more. My dad had cancer, underwent chemo but still carried on. I couldn't just wallow in my own self pity any more, my dad wouldn't have and his legacy lives on in me. This is when I learned that God can bring healing through death in many ways. It's a strange concept I know! But it's quite amazing that God was able to bring me healing in spite of the grief I was suffering. 

October! My oldest baby, Quenton, turned the big 13!!! I am officially the mother of a teenager, yikes! I'm not gonna lie, this frightens me. And also makes me so thankful for Jesus. I'm counting on Him to get us through the next several years.

After Thanksgiving I realized that this would be our first Christmas without my dad.

God's grace again got us through. The holiday was simple and relaxing. Our hearts were full of love and memories. 

Losing my dad was the back drop of 2013. But I experienced God's grace in a new way. 

And I think for the first year ever, I can honestly say that I look forward to what 2014 has to bring. I am not a resolution maker but I continue to try and approach life differently then in my past. If I had to chose a word for my year I think it would be Refine. Refine who I am, be a better me. 

I would love to know about you! Are you a resolution maker? A one word chooser? How are you approaching 2014?